Sunday, May 02, 2010

A Short Play About Chicago

NOTE: Mystique will continue to answer your questions in the comments as long as you've got them. I'm considering a Mystique-based self-help column if I get enough of a response.

Mark: Hey Mystique Summers-Madison, what's your favorite movie?
Mark: Bitch, I love Chicago!
Joe: HAHAHA
Joe: Hey Mystique, what's your preferred style of Deep Dish pizza?
Mark: Bitch, I prefer Chicago!
Mark: Hey Mystique, who were the best purveyors of 80s power ballads and mom-friendly mid-tempo hits?
Joe: Bitch, I dig Chicago!
Mark: Nope! Air Supply.
Joe: ...Hooker.

18 comments:

Kirk Hamilton said...

Hey Mystique, what's your favorite track from Sufjan Stevens' Illinoise?

Joe Reid said...

Bitch, it's the sweet and melodious "Chicago"!

Roommate Mark said...

Hey Mystique, what's your favorite Manual of Style?

Joe Reid said...

Bitch, I use Chicago!

Bark said...

Hey Mystique, which is your favorite Sox baseball team?

Joe Reid said...

I'll give you a clue: Bitch, they hail from Chicago!

Kris McN said...

Hey Mystique, who's your favorite faucet manufacturer?

Joe Reid said...

Bitch, my landlord handles all my bathroom fixture needs, but I hope he buys Chicago!

StinkyLulu said...

Mystique, I don't suppose you have a favorite femininist artist?

ShoNuff Lives said...

Mystique, can you give me directions?

Joe Reid said...

re ShoNuff: Bitch, drive in the direction of Chicago!

re StinkyLulu: Bitch, I don't get the reference but I assume she's named or from Chicago!

StinkyLulu said...

Judy Chicago forgot your 2-piece-and-a-biscuit when she set her Dinner Party.

http://www.brooklynmuseum.org/eascfa/dinner_party/home.php

ShoNuff Lives said...

this is country to me. that's western.

Jesse10011 said...

I AM SO INTO THIS

sammitt said...

Hey Mystique, a Second City comedy troupe is currently performing in Phoenix (true story) and staying in an apartment complex next to the bar where my roommate works. (True story: http://www.secondcity.com/Performances/Detail/41) Where the heck are these smart-alecks from?

Joe Reid said...

Bitch, as their name implies, they're from Chicago!

jessica said...

Hey Mystique, do you know of any Frank Sinatra-kind of towns?

Joe Reid said...

Bitch, his kind of town is Chicago!