Saturday, October 24, 2009

RW/RR Challenge Episode 4 All-Star

I've been lax on these lately, but this past episode -- the fightiest one yet! -- really called out for comment.

Dishonorable Mentions:

Evan for daring to play the shocked good guy in the Veronica/Tonya situation after spending days (seasons, really) poking at the Tonyas of this show and trying to score points with it in interviews. At least an a-hole like Kenny doesn't try to be the nice guy afterwards.

Sarah for...being Sarah. Sorry, honey, but while I'm sure Katie was in the wrong for blowing up at you, she is awesome and you are not, and your showboating after defeating her only serves to make me hate you more. Same with you being all BFF with Susie. And? Never quote from They Live again.

Casey for being the worst. The absolute WORST.

Honorable Mentions:

Darrell and whatever editor was annoyed enough by Danny to include those shots of a newly soft-bellied Danny chowing down on cheeseburgers. Good to know the women aren't the only ones getting slammed for their bodies. Now who's going to have the balls to bring up Evan's weird body-shape situation. Hard and soft and pasty all over, it's a walking contradiction and none of it appealing.

Tonya for, despite everything she's done to make herself look like a pathetic, burned out, wasted wreck of a human being, doing two things; saying the following: "Yeah, I get drunk and I fight and get stupid, and occasionally, a boob falls out"; and b) she slapped the SHIT out of Veronica (after first slapping the SHIT out of her cup o' noodles). Not even Katie managed to do that. I'm glad to see her gone, because she makes me sad now, but at least she slipped some catharsis in on her way out. Oh, and c) she caught that bug in front of Wes AND ATE IT. Okay, maybe I'm not so glad to see her go.

Cohutta for actually being the one decent guy on this show. Well, okay, him and Brad...and possibly Derrick. Syrus too, I guess. Fine, ONE of the very few good guys on this show. Note how he managed to talk about how fucked up that group of guys is without coming across like a sanctimonious ass? On an entirely unrelated note...

First Runner-Up:
Wes for actually fooling me into thinking there's a halfway decent guy buried deep under the bombast, paranoia, steroids, and freckles. When he went and broke up the Tonya/Veronica scuffle (while Evan tried to hold him back, the ass), and then refused to let Evan off the hook for being an asshole to Tonya, I actually mentally placed him a smidge higher than Evan, Johnny, and Kenny. And then he had to go seven steps further and play Dr. Phil and climb up on his high horse and generally make me hate him again. God forbid he gets eliminated from this show, of course. It'd be deadly boring without him. But man, what a dick.

Second Runner-Up
Veronica, for reminding us all why we've always hated her. Veronica's is a combination of snooty better-than-you-ness and a vicious instinct to harm. That's always been combined with a total inability to deal with it when shit gets real, of course. She's always been the biggest coward. Which made it all the sweeter when a wound-up Tonya finally went off on her. And THEN when the meatheaded masses failed to back her up afterwards. Watching her tearfully slink away was delicious.

This Week's Challenge All-Star
Katie, because this may well be the last chance I ever have to talk about how much I love that tar-lunged tasmanian devil. She says this will be her last Challenge -- a likely story as even she admits, but she gave us no time to dwell on questions of credibility because she then said she wants to concentrate on being a wife and a mom. A MOM! I demand an MTV special in 15 years where we watch as little Katie Jr. watches tapes from these shows. Anyway, Katie got beat, and it was sad. But she put up a better fight in this Challenge than she has in the past couple she's been on. But the fact that the show failed to send her off with a Timmy-style clip package and sepia walkoff is predictably outrageous. As it stands, I'm let with the following two quotes from this week's ep, courtesy of the one and only Katie Doyle. "Don't laugh at me when I have a plunger in my bed, bitch. Ever." And "All she wants to do is kiss you guys. Guess what? You're fat and you got tattoos and nobody gives a shit!" Never forget, Katie. Never forget.

1 comment:

DuchessKitty said...

God YES! I agree wholeheartedly with all of your observations.
And seriously, who do I have to blow to make sure a reality show about Katie and her future offspring gets made?