Tuesday, May 26, 2009

Blogging the 2009 Upfronts: A Viewer's Guide

Sorry about crapping out mid-week on the upfront announcements. The CBS and NBC presentations bored me to tears, and while The CW has a few cracked-out shows in the pipeline, I was mostly grumbling about how that Gossip Girl prequel got denied after what I thought was a fun backdoor pilot. (As always, The Futon Critic is an invaluable resource for the upfronts, TV schedules, premiere dates, and everything else I use to keep my nerd lists updated.)

Anyway, like I did last year, I'm going to give you an peek into the perverse house of horrors that is my fall TV schedule. If you feel like calling the local authorities on behalf of my DVR, I wouldn't entirely blame you. I present this as both an exercise in showing y'all what new shows I'm giving a shot, and which old shows I'm dropping (this season, it was quite a few -- and I'm usually the last person to give up on a show); and also to give you all someone to feel superior towards in terms of your TV watching habits. Since I did drop quite a few shows over the last season, I feel like I'm a bit more streamlined than usual, but it's all relative.

To the grid! (new shows in bold)

8 PM: How I Met Your Mother (CBS)
8 PM: Gossip Girl (CW)
8 PM: Greek (ABC Family)

I dropped Heroes, and while I'd like to say I'm dropping The Hills, you and I both know that's probably not true. Sigh.

8 PM: So You Think You Can Dance (FOX)
9 PM: Melrose Place (CW)

I've gushed about the fall season of SYTYCD already. The lowdown on Melrose 2.0: Sydney Andrews is alive, no one seems to feel the need to explain how, Michael Mancini is back, and Sydney has some kind of sexual past with his son. AWESOME. Also, Colin Egglesfield from All My Children will make you all very, very happy.

8 PM: So You Think You Can Dance (FOX)
9 PM: Glee (FOX)
9 PM: The Modern Family (ABC)
9:30 PM: Cougar Town (ABC)

I've also already gushed about Glee, and these two new ABC sitcoms. Missing from this list: America's Next Top Model, which I've dropped (see you in hell, Tyra) and Top Chef, which will most likely get slotted at 10pm for the fall.

8 PM: Survivor (CBS)
8 PM: Flash Forward (ABC)
8 PM: The Vampire Diaries (CW)
8:30 PM: Parks & Recreation (NBC)
9 PM: Fringe (FOX)
9 PM: The Office (NBC)
9:30 PM: Community (NBC)
10 PM: Project Runway (Lifetime)

Oh, Thursdays. As insane as ever. 8PM looks like a bloodbath, which could (ironically) doom my chances of seeing Ian Sommerhalder looking pale and sexy (...some more) in The Vampire Diaries. From what little I understand of the plot of Twilight, this is exactly that. With Ian and the eyebrows guy from that season of Everwood where Amy debuted the Bangs of Sadness. Kind of sad to see Fringe moved away from its old time slot (and eventual Idol lead-out), but hopefully it's built a loyal fanbase who will follow it). Oh, and Community is the NBC sitcom starring Joel "The Soup" McHale.

9 PM: Ugly Betty (ABC)
9 PM: Dollhouse (FOX)
10 PM: The Soup (E!)

Here's also where Southland is set to air, in the suddenly super-competitive 9PM slot. So if I end up catching up and liking NBC's cop drama over the summer, I'm gonna have some decisions to make.

8 PM: The Amazing Race (CBS)
10 PM: Brothers & Sisters (ABC)

In addition, the following cable shows are set to air this fall:
Mad Men
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
Top Chef
The Real Housewives of Atlanta
The Bad Girls Club

And it's until 2010 for:
30 Rock
Better Off Ted
United States of Tara
Friday Night Lights
Big Love
RuPaul's Drag Race
Day One (NBC)
Happy Town (ABC)
and of course the dread behemoth American Idol.

...Wait, did I say "streamlined" up there? Was I possibly high?


CT said...

However, since The Vampire Diaries truly came first (in novel form), Twilight is really the same as that. (And it SO is.)

The Vampire Diaries were my favorite books when I was but a wee lass, but Twilight leaves me cold. Must be an adolescent, puberty thing.

(Which leads to thoughts about the correlation between menses and vampires, which is super creepy...)

Judi said...

Sydney's back on MP??? Ohhhh okay, I'm officially in!

Jon said...

Wait, 30 Rock is not back until 2010? What the hey?

Joe Reid said...

At the very least it's a late premiere. "Community" has its time slot to start the season. Maybe late October/November? I don't know, NBC was kinda vague.

Patty M. said...

SO in for "V" -- The original miniseries won Robert Englund a place in my heart forever. And I have an autographed picture of Marc Singer (later of Beastmaster fame) framed on my bookshelf. God, I loved that show (speaking of adolescent, puberty things).

Deirdre said...

No Chuck in 2010?

Joe Reid said...

There's "Chuck" in 2010, just not for me. I never really caught on. Please don't get nerds to throw Subway sandwiches at me.