Anyway, so today I caught the new Eminem video -- exactly how new it is I'm not sure, but E!Online was writing about it today like it was just off the assembly line, so maybe I'm getting in on the ground floor for once. Anyway, here it is:
Is that not just the saddest thing you've ever seen? I mean -- look, I make no bones about the fact that I don't like Eminem and I'm looking for the negative almost constantly. But what always made him so maddening back in his heyday was that no matter how much I wanted to hate him, I had to admit that "The Real Slim Shady" was some catchy shit. Or that "Lose Yourself" was a goddamn masterpiece. This new video is just ... well, like I said, it's sad.
It's not a new observation to say that Eminem's obsession with celebrity shit-talking has always focused on the weakest, most obvious targets on the landscape. That's true on "We Made You" to a near-parodic degree. He's talking about exactly who you'd think: Britney, Lindsay, Jessica Simpson, Bret Michaels. Hey, have you heard Amy Winehouse is a drug-addled mess? Nailed it! Even the requisite gay-bashing focuses on how hot girls like Lindsay Lohan and Portia DeRossi are too sexy to be eating box. Yawn. But whereas the tired celebrity baiting in, say, "Without Me" was paired with a maddeningly singable hook, "We Made You" is the kind of tuneless dreck that made "Ass Like That" (you know, the video with the "Crank Yankers" puppets) such a career low point.
I can't decide whether this is Eminem's cynical attempt to cash in with the mainstream by going back to what's worked so well for him or if he honestly thinks someone like Jessica Simpson needs to be knocked down a peg in 2009. And I can't decide which would be sadder. The video really does remind me of a "Weird Al" video, with the wall-to-wall celebrity references that are barely relevant now, much less in a year or longer. Even the Sarah Palin stuff is so six months ago! Remember when everybody thought Eminem was so dangerous?? Doesn't that seem adorable now?
Maybe this is just me, though? Do you guys think this is a return to form? Are you happy to have Eminem stirring the pot again?
Oh, and p.s.: Em, if you're still getting hung up on gay dudes being all over your jock, maybe you should stop dressing up like a fetish object?
Regttably, I'd still hit that. Spitefully, but still.