Thursday, November 20, 2008

Smooth Joey Apollo's 2008 NFL Picks: Week 12

Aaron: 11-4-1 (0-1 vs. the spread)
Joe: 9-6-1 (0-1 vs. the spread)

Season to Date:
Aaron: 105-54-1 (5-6 vs. the spread)
Joe: 104-55-1 (5-6 vs. the spread)


Cincinnati at Pittsburgh
Aaron: The media’s awkward, passive-aggressive acknowledgement of NFL gambling in the immediate aftermath of last week’s Steelers game has been a kick to watch. Me thinks the spread won’t be in doubt in the 4th quarter here. Pick: Pittsburgh

Joe: Hey! Total points is totally the 11th tiebreaker criteria! It could come into play! Now that Cincy's gotten their 1.5 wins for the season, it's Pittsburgh's time to shine. Pick: Pittsburgh

Tampa Bay at Detroit
Aaron: F*ck it. This might be the Lions' best shot for a win thanks to the Bucs' ability to play down to their opponents. The euphoria should last until Detroit's annual Thanksgiving whippin'. Pick: Detroit

Joe: Quick 'n' Hungover picks this morning? You bet! Looks like now it's MY turn to gain some ground while AARON picks the Lions. Happy holidays to you to, sir! Pick: Tampa Bay

Philadelphia at Baltimore
Aaron: Donovan McNabb is the type of personality who could turn a week's worth of talk-radio mocking ("There are ties in the NFL?!") into motivation for a huge game. Assuming Ray Lewis doesn't rip his heart out. Pick: Philadelphia

Joe: I had this whole thing planned about how I'm totally done with Donovan McNabb and the entire Eagles team after my faith in them was met by ... whatever it was they did last week. Which ... I guess I just said all that, so: yeah. Pick: Baltimore

Houston at Cleveland
Aaron: The Browns have put up 30 and 29 points, respectively, in Brady Quinn's first two starts at QB. "But, look who he was playing", you retort? "Applies here, too", I fire back. Pick: Cleveland

Joe: Uh-oh, he's arguing with himself again. Pick: Cleveland

San Francisco at Dallas
Aaron: 15 years ago, this was arguably the greatest rivalry in sports. Where have you gone Mark Tuinei and Merton Hanks? Pick: Dallas

Joe: Aw. Merton's freakishly long neck still occasionally haunts my nightmares. Pick: Dallas

N.Y. Jets at Tennessee
Aaron: Right on time, Brett Favre has suckered the sports-loving populace into thinking its 1997 again. A win here would only add to the ebb and flow of Favre's weekly legacy as texted by Favre to SI's Peter King. Pick: Tennessee

Joe: If the Jets do win, good luck hearing about anything else in the sports world this week. Pick: Tennessee

Minnesota at Jacksonville
Aaron: The Jags looked pretty good for the first 30 minutes of their loss to undefeated Tennessee last week. That's about twice as long as they'll need to dispatch a Vikings team that can't win on the road. Pick: Jacksonville

Joe: I'm not sure the Jags can dispatch ANYONE quite that handily, but I agree with the general premise, yes. Pick: Jacksonville

Buffalo at Kansas City
Aaron: Joe and I disagreed whether or not ESPN went overboard with all the references to Scott Norwood after the Bills missed a 47-yard FG as time expired last Monday night. Pretty sure we'll disagree here, too. Pick: Kansas City

Joe: You'd think so, wouldn't you? Pick: Kansas City

New England at Miami
Aaron: This can't be right. The last time the Pats lost to the same team twice in the regular season was to Miami in 2000?! 2008's shaping up to the year that all kinds of crazy sh*t happened. Pick: Miami

Joe: Hmm ... Miami's been riding the razor's edge as of late, while New England, even in losing to the overrated Jets, have looked like the AFC East's best team. You know, again. Pick: New England

Chicago at St. Louis
Aaron: The Bears looked awful in last week's loss to the Packers. Combine a bruised ego with some postseason urgency and a cupcake for dessert…Bears score 200 here. Take it to the bank. Pick: Chicago

Joe: Here's where Devin Hester finally breaks one long, all while riding the bench on Joe's Underachieving Fantasy Team. Pick: Chicago

Oakland at Denver
Aaron: Once upon a time, there wasn't a greater Raiders fan on earth than me. Now, I'm just quietly ecstatic that I've got Jay Cutler in my money league. Psst, Jay. The key to beating the Raiders is to show up. Pick: Denver

Joe: Mike Shanahan himself rushes for 100 yards in this one. Pick: Denver

Carolina at Atlanta
Aaron: Has anyone else noticed that the Jake Delhomme I scooped up after his impressive showing in Week #1 has looked an awful lot like the Jake Delhomme who went undrafted in my fantasy league and was still available after Week #1? Anyone? Pick: Atlanta

Joe: Yeah, Carolina's been asking for it for a couple weeks now. Atlanta finally obliges. Pick: Atlanta

Washington at Seattle
Aaron: The Redskins have already had their NFC East-mandated "inexplicable loss to a terrible team" when the Rams beat 'em earlier this season. Pick: Washington

Joe:: While a single tear runs down Seneca Wallace's face, the Seahawks lose again. A high draft pick in April could be really beneficial for them (it won't take long to turn them around), so fans shouldn't despair too much. Pick: Washington

N.Y. Giants at Arizona
Aaron: Lots and lots of "upset" talk following this game, but Aaron ain't biting. As you know, I've been aboard the Giants' bandwagon since Week #10. Pick: NY Giants

Joe: And hanging off the side of it like one of those shoulder-padded freaks in Mad Max. Which, given your Raider Fan status, is pretty fitting. Pick: NY Giants

Indianapolis at San Diego
Aaron: Peyton Manning's 2008 is the greatest discrepancy between the talent level of a team's QB and the entirety of the roster around him. That said, I like the Chargers here. What? Pick: San Diego

Joe: Ugh, I have no idea. Home team default. Pick: San Diego

Green Bay at New Orleans
Aaron: Drew Brees throws for 400 yards…other team wins. Always pick what you know. Pick: Green Bay

Joe: I hope someone in New Orleans eventually tells them about what happens to your team once you indefinitely bench/trade Jeremy Shockey. You hate to see them floundering with him when they could flourish without him. Pick: New Orleans

The Sure-Thing Suicide Spread:

Aaron: Tampa Bay at Detroit (+8)

Joe: Chicago (-7.5) at St. Louis

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