Sunday, June 08, 2008

12 Days of Summer Movies: Rolls On

MARVEL at the woman who sat through Stolen Summer...on purpose!
The subtextual mission, meanwhile, is a quest undertaken by Project Greenlight to wring a successful movie out of the semi-autobiographical treacle penned and helmed by Pete Jones, despite Jones's inexperience; non-credible dialogue; contrived ignorance of major religions on the part of the main characters; trite subplots; a weak understanding of mid-seventies culture; Jeff Balis; and truly painful child acting that, while it is not entirely (or even mostly) their fault, is a serious problem in a film that centers on said children.

PUZZLE along with Sarah at the coded sexuality and couldn't-be-more-obvious melodrama of Tennessee Williams's Suddenly, Last Summer!
...not since Brenda Walsh went to Paris have I witnessed such wretched accent work — if you go by this movie, New Orleans is somewhere in western Massachusetts. Massachusetts, Quebec.

THRILL that you don't have to be the one to watch Summer Catch like I did!
It's a very bad movie that wanted very badly to be Bull Durham, but, you know, updated for the kids today. But no matter how many ballplayers wear ladies' underpants, or how many chatty conversations take place on the pitcher's mound, this is no Bull Durham. And Jessica Biel's Tenley Parrish (…Jesus) is no Annie Savoy.

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