Tuesday, January 15, 2008

A Suppressive Post from a Suppressive Person


I haven't talked about Tom Cruise on this blog in forever, but this is totally going to make up for it, because OH MY GOD. Sarah posted today, on Tomato Nation, about this video clip of Tom Cruise in this Scientology recruitment tape, and it might just be the scariest, weirdest, most hilarious but also alarming thing I have ever seen. The way he talks about Scientology -- the anger and intensity and rabble-rousing -- honestly makes me think they're amassing something. Preparing for something. They're the Cylons now and They Have A Plan.

Seriously, some quotes:

"Being a Scientologist, when you drive past an accident, it's not like anyone else. You know you have to do something about it because you know you're the only one who can really help." [He doesn't mean an actual car accident. The car accident, for him, is the world. And by "help," he means "annihilate."]

"I won't hesitate to put Ethics in on someone else. Because I put it ruthlessly on myself." [...dude, I don't know. But it sounds threatening, right? You have to see him say it, with the crazy-eyed intensity and the I'm-not-fucking-around turtleneck.]

"We are the authorities on getting people off drugs, we are the authorities on the mind...we can rehabilitate criminals...the way to happiness, we can bring peace and unite cultures." [They can bring PEACE! That doesn't sound good.]

"It is the time, now. Now is the time." [...to do what??? Do you see what I mean?]

"I'd like to go on vacation and go and romp and play...but I can't. Because I know. I know. So...I have to do something about it." [Okay, does he mean he had vacation plans, like, next month but cancelled them because something has to be done? Next week? Some time in April? What is he planning, you guys???]

"Maybe one day it'll be like that. Maybe one day it'll be like, "Wow, SPs..." They'll just read about those in the history books." ["SPs" = "suppressive persons." Who will soon be eradicated and consigned to history books, I guess. I'm boarding up my windows this weekend, seriously.]

Cruise talks some more about "shattering" suppressive persons and how none of them will dare approach him in public because they'll be taken down. And how they have no time for "spectators" in the religion now, because it's, like, Go Time or whatever. And then he does that crazy Tom Cruise Laugh for an uncomfortable length of time like he's actually Dr. Evil. And then he accepted a "Freedom Medal Of Valor" from the Scientologists. Neither of those last two sentences is a joke.

Dude, the Revolution is coming. And when they come for the Engrams, you'd better speak up, and when they come for the SPs you better speak up, because they'll be coming for you next and no one will be left to speak up.

Also, thanks, Will Smith, for just giving this loon another hundred million dollars. I don't care if it was your wife's idea, you were West Philadelphia born and raised. Even your Auntie and Uncle in Bel Air taught you better than that.

6 comments:

JA said...

Eww! I wish I hadn't watched that. I put it off all day, and I decide to watch it relatively close to bedtime? NIGHTMARES! I say this with no hyperbole intended: That man is a complete fucking psychopath.

The worst part is, there were a couple moments when I thought he looked sorta cute and I thought he could definitely use a good hate-fucking.

Gah! Some things are not to be spoken! Must get clean, must get clean!!!

Joe Reid said...

Seriously, dude. I think you just gave me an engram.

AB and the Bear Suits said...

Every Sunday we have dinner with my 88 year-old grandparents which is usually a treat because they're spry and sharp for being so old. Of late, however, on Sundays my grandma fills us in on celebrity gossip, because that's what old people do when they're not watching NCIS. This week she authoritatively informed us that Tom Cruise Rosemary's-Babied Katie Holmes with L. Ron Hubbard's frozen sperm. Anyhow, I'd watch out, they have the technology.

jessica said...

Blergh. Don't you just miss the Good Old Days when Tom Cruise was sexy heartthrob/rebel Maverick, mourning over Goose?

Carrie Ann said...

If it makes you feel safer, I think this video is from 2005. So, maybe whatever he's planning is still a ways down the road.

I love the self-importance the most. Only WE can help people in accidents, people addicted to drugs, people who commit crimes - only WE can save the world! I mean, how could he take a vacation? He has LOTS to do.

StickyKeys said...

Oh I love him soooo much!

From a distance mind you, but still.