Monday, October 01, 2007

Dear Heterosexual Men Of America

Listen to what ABC is saying to you:

You're fucking stupid. You're too fucking stupid to handle anything beyond a sitcom about cavepeople and another one about people whose only discernable skill is driving to work. Anything beyond that? You're just too dumb. Brothers & Sisters? Not likely. Lost? You've got to be kidding.

I also love how, sure, Ugly Betty, Grey's Anatomy, and Desperate Housewives are likely too girly/faggy for straight dude, but like...Lost, too? Lost is too damn vag-friendly for the steak and belching people? I love that they show a shot of Hurley while they condemn the show for being too queer. Look, just because he has man-boobs does not make him a transsexual, okay?

I also want a documentary-style account of what it was like to be in the marketing meeting that came up with "Man Date" as a suitable slogan to rope in the manly men. So butch!


adam k. said...

Maybe Battlestar Galactica's too gay for straight dudes cause it features a woman president, women pilots, and men who have sex with cylons. Plus a slightly fey British character.

Friday Night Lights, at least, should be pretty safe.

Joe R. said...

With all those hot dudes? Unlikely.

That Bootleg Guy said...

My theory is that ABC had to blow thru the remaining ad budget for "Cavemen" and "Carpoolers" or else give the money back to their sponsors when the shows are cancelled around Columbus Day.

Ergo..."Man Date".

Can't wait!

NYOne said...

Hm, and now the new commercials for Man Date are set to a song from that bastien of All-American Manliness...Junior Senior. Kind of awesome.

jessica said...

I am officially offended. Thank God I DVR most everything and almost never watch commercials. And yet ... Laird, Aubrey and Gracen? These are the names of their manliest of men? Really? Moreso than Jack? And Sawyer? Really??