Dudes, [Katharine] wants off that stage in the worst way. Her eyes are all squirrelly and darting around the auditorium, like she's looking for an actual escape hatch. Meanwhile, Ryan's spiel takes twice as long because he has to explain to the at-home audience how two separate phone lines work. We get it! Letters become numbers on a phone keypad! Cut to commercial before she makes a break for it! OH MY GOD nobody's going to text message for this dumb show! Go to commercial!
Read all about the boring love songs, crazy judge behavior, and unsupportable conspiracy theories in this week's American Idol recap, "What's a 'Swan Song'?"