So, if you’re not like me and you don’t regularly check Defamer every morning like it’s the best part of waking up, you’ve likely missed one of the summer’s underrated subplots: Owen Wilson, The Butterscotch Stallion. This week, it all comes to a head as Wilson addresses gossip column claims of a proclivity for ass-licking with one of the more priceless sexual euphemisms in recent memory. “There’s lots of different paths to the waterfall,” you guys. Don’t ever forget it.
Elsewhere . . .
Hissyfit’s Wing Chun takes a stand against the melon. Now, I don’t have so much of a problem with melon. A good slice of cantaloupe on a hot day? Heaven. But I have to hand it to anyone who can tell an innocent piece of fruit to fuck off. Well played.
Aaron Cameron whines his way back into my good graces this week. And he didn’t even have to, because this week’s Bootleg was on. There are times I just want to see the look on Cam’s face when he logs onto the Internet and sees Lil’ Kim in the news. It’s been Christmas all year round in the Cameron household.
Also? Mathan Erhardt continues to be back. Happy days are here again. Again. This week, Math calls for a DVD release for The State. I’ll second, third, and fourth that request. And let him know whether you’d rather be a Smurf or an inmate at Oz. either way, you’re dealing with a whole lot of dude.